We got this thing working!
So I don’t know the entire story…most of it is being kept from me so I can’t be compelled to testify against anybody in case this goes to court (STAAAAR COURT!), but the good Padre Fedora managed to single-handedly storm his way 
onto a Nova class starship, pirate their copy of LCARS, escape with life and limb intact, and then kitbash it into a usable interface for our needs. So props for that!!
-LNKXO